BREXMAS CAROLS SUNG BY THE CAST OF BREXODUS THE MUSICAL WERE RELEASED OVER CHRISTMAS BY REMAINIACS.COM, THE GALLOPING REMAINERS' PODCAST

TO BE SUNG AROUND THE YULETIDE FIRE, PERHAPS?

BORIS:
We three Brexit ministers are
Offering Brussels deals from afar
Customs union
Trade communion
Paid with a crunchie bar.
CHORUS:
Oh, Brexit wonder, Brexit dream
Things are better than they seem,
Westward leading, Trump is tweeting,
We’re the cats that get the cream.
BORIS:
Bugger all to offer have I,
Bloody foreigners need not apply.
On our island,
We’ve a free hand,
Selling stuff on the sly.
CHORUS:
Oh, Brexit wonder, Brexit dream etc.
REMAINERS:
We wish you a Merry Brexmas
We wish you a Merry Brexmas
We wish you a Merry Brexmas
From Remain-i-acs 
Bad tidings we bring
To you and your kin
Theresa and Boris
Have screwed everything.
We wish them a Messy Brexmas, 
Political impasse,
A kick up their fat arse
From Remain-i-acs
Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
Fa la la la laaah, la la la la,
Brexit is the height of folly
Fa la la la laaah, la la la la,
Staying in Europe’s a no-brainer
Fa la la la la, laah la la
Proud to say I’m a Remainer
Fa la la la laaah, la la la la.
THERESA:
Bad boy Boris arsed about
Offending other nations,
Acted like a stupid lout
And ruined good relations. 
Nightly came the press reports
Of his gaffes abundant
With such blunders and retorts
Surely he’s redundant.
REMAINERS:
Ding dong gloomily below
The Brexit bores are singing
Progress is so very slow
With all the mud they’re slinging.
CHORUS:
Loo-oo-sers 
Stick with us Remainers
Loo-oo-sers
Stick with us Remain-i-acs
BORIS:
God rest ye merry Brexiteers
The world’s in disarray
Theresa May your leader
Has plainly lost her way
It’s time she paid the penalty
For leading us astray
O tidings of exit and gloom
Exit and gloom
O tidings of exit and gloom